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Lessons in Diversity, Inclusion & Bias (DIBSs): How to talk about Roe v. Wade with your team

Don’t avoid the seemingly impossible conversations. Here’s how to address hot-button issues with your team.

Over the last several weeks I have had the opportunity to speak with several leaders in the food industry about the overturning of Roe v. Wade (my guess is you may have as well). There are several conclusions that I have come to from these conversations. I wonder if your reflections are similar. Chief among my learnings is the following: We have become experts at avoiding the “impossible” issues and questions while simultaneously mastering the language and mindset that we ought to be or are driving towards inclusion.

Let’s start with a definition of the “impossible” issues and questions.

It is hot; it is “front page news”: It is absolutely on the front pages and websites of major publications nationally and within industries. It is the topic of the moment across social media platforms. It is the water-cooler, coffee-table and dinner-table topic.

It is emotionally charged: It hits at the guts and hearts of most if not many. People, team members, guests, and people on the streets are having visceral reactions. Some who appear to be more “professional” are boiling and their reactions seem just below the surface. 

It is politically connected: Like many decisions in today’s environment, it is connected to a left or right position. And, as such, the extremities of the thinking, decisions, opinions, etc. own the center of the stage.

It is personal/intimate to many: The issue or question often relates to a decision or set of decisions made by a person in a critical moment in their lives. Whether the results of the decision are wonderful and full of great and positive energy, or whether the decision is soft, gentle, and subtle, or even whether it is sad, challenging and sticky, the nexus and the guts and the critical factors involve the person in the mirror and perhaps a very few personal/intimate friends and family. 

It affects vastly more people in our organizations than we care to admit: Whether you do the math or make some educated guesses, these issues and questions impact significant numbers of our teams, guests, and clients — and that is simply those who are directly impacted. Secondary and tertiary impacts expand this number exponentially and dramatically.

It is a subject that senior leaders have been told and trained to NOT talk about for the majority of our professional careers: If you happen to be a Gen X’er, Boomer or older, then you were told — often in plain and abrupt terms — what to discuss and what NOT to discuss in the business setting. We were subsequently trained to avoid these discussions and given language/terminology to help drive the point home. And, if you happen to be a part of the generations I mentioned, you have been working these skills and using these tools for decades and you have become quite adept at navigating through your career with them.

With this as a backdrop or definition for “impossible” issues and questions, we can jump into what I mean when I say “while simultaneously mastering the language and mindset that we ought to be or are driving towards inclusion.”

As is the case in most challenging subjects, writing about it and talking about it is much easier than doing it. And it is the writing and talking part that often comes first or at least before the doing. As a result, most organizations have pretty good language around inclusion on their websites, and documents that represent their position. Further, they have likely workshopped the thinking associated with the language. As a result, their mindset is in tune with the language that has been developed. This is what I mean by mastery.

Do we see the disconnect?

We have the language. We have the understanding. Many of us have even begun much of the “doing.” Yet we appear to avoid the biggest of the challenges that the language and the understanding of inclusion was designed to help us approach, discuss, unpack, and identify the business impact. After identifying the business impact, we can then create or reinforce business practices, policies, and practices that align with who we say we are.

Leaders must strive to connect the hard work they have done in the inclusion space with impossible issues and questions of the day. We must do this in the absence of being well prepared. This does require a special kind of courage. But here is the “magic”: You have done this before. You have already led or participated in a policy related discussion where you were not comfortable nor confident in your level of understanding nor your expertise. Here is your opportunity to do it again.

Here are some recommendations to make it happen:

  • Identify an expert facilitator (vs. an expert in the subject being discussed) and ask them to help you drive a conversation about the impossible issues or questions. This conversation must of course be in alignment with the diversity and inclusion statements/commitments your organization has made and values. 
  • Consider finding a coach for yourself to help you build on the skills you currently have such that you can lead these conversations with a higher level of comfort and confidence, in the absence of expertise.

In summary, leaders need to connect their work on the language and mindset of inclusivity with the practice of having the “impossible” conversations. Many leaders are already walking this path. We should all join them along the way.

AUTHOR BIO

James Pogue, PhD is a consultant in the areas of Diversity, Inclusion and Equity. He’s the founder of JP Enterprises and believes that sharing the results of his research with leaders and decision makers is his way to be a catalyst for positive change.

TAGS: Operations
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